WARDOGS achievements: all ten, what each requires, and how many players had them three days after launch

Descriptions are Steam's; rates are the global percentages from Steam's achievement statistics for app 1867240 on 13 September 2026. 'That was rude' has no public description because it is hidden.

72.7% completed the tutorial. The other 27% either skipped it or bought the game and had not reached it yet — on launch day, PCGamesN reports, 168,000 people were in the login queue while 45,590 were in the game, so a chunk of that gap is people who had not got past the queue. The hidden 'That was rude' at 11.7% is unlocked in the tutorial too, going by its internal name, ACH_TUTORIAL_PUNCH_KRISTOPHER — Kristopher being, presumably, the tutorial's instructor. Steam reports the two internal percentages as 71.5% and 11.4% at the API level and 72.7%/11.7% on the achievements page a few minutes apart, which is the population growing between reads.

The gap between 72.7% and 11.7% is also a measurement: roughly one in six tutorial finishers found the punch.

A Steam community guide ('Hidden Achievement!', by lirika, read 14 September) confirms the method and spells the name Christopher: play the tutorial, revive Christopher, and when told to enter the next room, stay, switch to fists and punch him — 'The hidden achievement should unlock immediately.'

Three caveats before drawing conclusions. First, the denominator is every Steam account that owns the game, including the 27% who had not finished the tutorial — some of whom had not launched it, given that BULKHEAD posted 1.25 million copies sold at 01:05 UTC on 11 September and PCGamesN reported 1.5 million a day later, so the population was still growing by hundreds of thousands during the read. Second, hidden achievements report their rate but not their description; the internal name is the only public clue. Third, Steam's two endpoints disagree by about a point (the API said 71.5% for the tutorial, the web page 72.7%) because they are cached at different times — we quote the page and keep the API file for the record.

None of that changes the ordering. Tutorial first, then the two easy combat oddities (Ricochet, the punch), then the cash milestones, then endurance and marksmanship, then the three that require either a specific kill, a perfect team result, or a six-figure gamble. That ordering is the game's difficulty curve as its own players experienced it in the first 72 hours.

Steam's API exposes each achievement's internal identifier alongside its unlock rate, and the names show how BULKHEAD categorises them: two tutorial, three combat, three economy, one survival, one match. That split — as many economy achievements as combat ones — is the design statement in miniature.

Three achievements are about money, and their spread is the economy in miniature. 'Fat Stacks' — $100,000 net profit in a single life — at 9.1% means about one player in eleven has had a life that earned ten times the starting bank. 'Top Dog' — top cash earner across all three teams — at 4.5% is by definition capped at one player per match, so its rate mostly tracks how many matches have been played per account. 'Big Spender' — $100,000 on a single loadout — at 0.1% is the rarest achievement in the game: almost nobody has yet put a six-figure kit on the line, which fits BULKHEAD's rebalance goal that 'big ticket items' belong to 'the top 5%' and the Season 1 prices (Artillery Tank $500,000, Large Hammer $75,000 on the Support track, Little Bird with miniguns $50,000).

Reddit's r/WarDogs had a post titled 'I just unlocked the most RAREST achievement in WARDOGS' in its top posts of launch week; with Big Spender at 0.1%, that is probably the one.

'Ricochet' (11.8%) — a kill with a ricochet bullet — confirms the ballistics model bounces rounds, consistent with BULKHEAD's 'real-world ballistics' claim in the May 2026 devlog. 'Long Shot' (2.4%) — a kill from over 950 m — tells you the effective sniping envelope the designers had in mind, and that the Control Zone (2 km across) is big enough for it; the Recon scopes are $40,000–45,000 after Season 1. 'Do Not Resuscitate' (0.8%) — a kill with the defibrillator charge — confirms the defibrillator is a weapon as well as a medic tool, and that revives are a real system (they are a paid teamplay action on the wiki's list).

'CZ Survivor' (2.6%) — 60 minutes in the Control Zone without dying — is the one that tells you about match length: matches run at least an hour, or nobody would have it. Combined with the wiki's rule that the team with the most players in the zone scores, it also describes the ideal objective player.

For anyone chasing the list rather than reading it: the tutorial and the punch come first and together. Ricochet needs a surface and a bullet that bounces — the ballistics model supports it, and 11.8% got it without trying, so it will come. Fat Stacks and Top Dog are the money guide in practice: PCGamesN's low-risk methods (build, taxi, mobile spawn, supply crates) compound over a long life, and the Hot Zone doubles cash for anyone inside it. CZ Survivor rewards exactly the player the wiki says wins matches — the one who stays inside the zone — for sixty minutes; a FOB with anti-air and a mortar is how the sources describe surviving there. Long Shot needs the $40,000–45,000 Recon scopes and a tower. Do Not Resuscitate needs a defibrillator and an enemy who lets you get close. Clean Sweep is a team result you cannot force alone. Big Spender is $100,000 on one loadout — the price of an armed Little Bird plus a Large Hammer plus a scope, roughly — and 0.1% of players had done it, which is also the share who could afford to lose it.

'Clean Sweep' (0.6%) — win a match without another team scoring a point — is the only achievement about the team result rather than the individual. In a three-team King of the Hill where the leading team accrues points while it holds the majority in the zone, a clean sweep means neither rival ever held the zone for a scoring tick. At 0.6% it is rare but not unheard of, which suggests some matches are lopsided from the first capture — the kind of match the Hot Zone magnet from the towers guide is designed to swing.

There is no achievement for towers, FOBs, mortars, vehicles or levels. Ten achievements on a game with six progression tracks is thin, and the Steam Early Access Q&A's promise of 'a stronger seasonal meta game' and a 'Player Skills & Challenge System' suggests the challenge side will grow outside Steam's list.

If you have Fat Stacks, you are in the top tenth of accounts on the economy; if you have CZ Survivor, the top 3% on objective play; if you have Long Shot, the top 2.4% on marksmanship — as of the read date. The percentages will rise as the population plays more matches, so the honest comparison is against the rates on the day you check, which Steam shows on the achievements page. We will re-read and re-chart them; the caption carries the date so you can see how stale the chart is.

One more use for the list: it is the only official statement of scale for several mechanics. 950 metres is the designed long shot; sixty minutes is a plausible zone-holding stint; $100,000 is the designers' idea of a big life and a big loadout. Nowhere else does BULKHEAD publish a distance, a duration or a loadout budget, so when a guide elsewhere says 'snipers engage at 300 m' or 'a good loadout costs $20,000', the achievements are the only official numbers to check it against.